Un-fur All

This modern age has passed us by, against all our demurral.
The younger crowd keep privates trim but ours are bushy squirrels.
Why, I can barely find the nuts, and where hides she the pearl?
I guess it’s time to wave the flag, and happy zones un-fur-all.

WordPress daily writing prompt (word highlighted above).

 

Natty and Gnatty

Gnatty:
“I like your shirt. Did you just buy it? It looks so crisp and natty.
If you don’t mind my saying so, your old one was so ratty.”

Natty:
“That’s very kind of you, my dear, and you appear less fatty.
I noticed that your fly’s loose though—the room is getting gnatty.”

WordPress daily writing prompt (word highlighted above).

 

 

Doctor-Patient Ice-Breaking

Doctor:
As we strap you in the stirrup, tell me what you do for work.

Patient:
I work in advertising, selling distant dreams to jerks.
The things I make are substanceless; they’re all imaginary.

Doctor:
My work site tends to more tactile, and quite vaginary.

Patient:
The pay is good but sometimes people’s smiles are gnashing teeth.

Doctor:
The view is great—but sometimes I can’t breathe because of queef.

WordPress daily writing prompts (words highlighted above).

 

Eating Out

 

He:
Oh my darling, stop giving me flap
That we never go out and you’re trapped.
Let’s go out somewhere classy
Where the rails are brassy
And the waitresses sit in your lap.

She:
Not a taco but super burrito
Will it take to wake up my libido.
Your chorizo is stale–
How about Chippendale’s?
We can check out some class wearing speedos.

WordPress daily writing prompt (word highlighted above).