On a day more suitable for the beach than the office, here is another groaningly over-reached pun on the WordPress daily writing prompt …
“Dude, I think you missed your crest!
You should be up there with the rest.”
“But then I’m only following the wake.
Sh*t, I’d rather go for outside break.”
This medical corset’s not working.
As a dancer, my duties I’m shirking!
When I bent to plie
I felt something give way.
Now this ab rupture keeps me from twerking.
Overheard at the haberdashery convention:
“That tailor is sew off the cuff–
Compleately biased basting.
He’s darning us with verbal darts
And notions not worth facing.”
“It seams his chintzy wares will also reek.
Let’s leave before he comes unknit in pique.”
I guess there is simply no beating it.
This ritual, I’ll be repeating it.
I gorged at the feast
On too much of the beast–
Now my ass-ton is sh*tting a sheet of it.
“My darling, did it not occur
Why lights are dim? Now don’t demur.
It’s time to make that two-backed beast:
Let’s give these quiet sheets a stir.”
“Oh babe, I want to make you purr,
But I can’t see it to be sure.
Turn on the closet light at least
Or else you’ll force me to infer.”
It’s often said the market learns,
And then, once schooled, it teaches.
And sometimes Mr Market burns
You straight between the breaches.
A goring by a running bull
Can’t be retirement’s goal.
Some hibernate through winter lull,
I think I’ll tuck-n-roll.
WordPress daily writing prompt (linked above).
“It makes my chitlins stir, we’re such an eyeful,
Like pigs packed tight in methane-clouded sty full.”
“Don’t give me all that tripe; No need to wallow.
Our flesh will soon give pleasure with a swallow.”
WordPress daily writing prompt (highlighted above).